I'm Gonna Die! A Screenshot LP
A Let's Play of failtastic proportions.
Monday, March 3, 2014
Earthbound Part 12: Dusty Dunes Galaxy...I mean Desert
Well let's take one last look at this sunny place.
There are two tunnels on this route. The first leads to this nice foresty area, with coloration similar to that of Saturn Valley.
And then we end up in the desert.
World's worst bus stops.
I think I hate that guy.
DAMMIT WILL SOMEONE JUST GIVE THEM SOME APPLE PIE SO WE CAN BE ON OUR MERRY WAY.
Also here's a fun mechanic. On the road we walk all normal-like.
On sand, we start sweating. Yes if you spend too long in the sand you get heatstroke.
I feel a need to make buffalo burgers, can you help with that?
The wet towel and refreshing herb will both cure sun stroke. I buy one of...I can't remember now. Because about 15 seconds I did that, I remembered Healing Alpha also cures that. Also Picnic Lunch!
You're in is expensive and you should be ashamed.
Ooooh sweet upgrades.
Stupid upgrades costing money.
And then this guy is out here.
My laser is still super fancy, so I only get a bottle rocket.
I FORGOT WE SPEAK MONKEY THIS IS THE BEST
Don't move, they sense fear.
Ah, a plot for later.
Because we found a Double Burger!
The easy enemies of this area. The UFO is no issue at all.
The scorpion is a fucking assface who should die in a fire.
Descent chunk of XP.
I don't know which of them drops the fries but I ditch them.
OH NO OH NO NONNOONO
The Smilin' Spheres are THE worst! They can do magic and hit you.
AND THEY EXPLODE WHEN THEY DIE.
So now two of my friends are dead. Good news is I got the jump on this thing.
From what I can tell these are rare and drop a boatload of XP.
IQ went up by 1! Maximum HP went up by 2! Maximum PP went up by 4!
Offense went up by 2! Luck went up by 1! Maximum HP went up by 3! Maximum PP went up by 1!
Fuck off mole!
Now you may remember the drug store is only a hotel. And hotels can't fix dead. So we walk.
Alllll the way back here.
Thankfully, we can bus back. The moral of this story is deserts are terrible places.
And go on frequent picnics.
That's a dinosaur. And WHAT KILLED THE DINOSAURS? THE ICE AGE!
Woo free burger.
FUCK OFF COOKIE
Now in this screenshot there is something that has gained quite a bit of fame on the internet.
The Black Sesame.
Seriously man, you have issues.
The desert wolf is the last of the enemies in the area. He's nothing special.
I finally break down and eat my pizza.
Oh hey, we can move faster.
And I take a moment to get everyone up to snuff.
Mmmm dessert desert. Or desert dessert.
CANT SAY THAT I AM MONKEY.
Woo free stuff!
Never change, hit detection. Never change.
Wait we auto-killed it?
Okey dokey then.
Offense went up by 1! Guts went up by 1! Vitality went up by 1! IQ went up by 1! Luck went up by 1! Maximum HP went up by 10! Maximum PP went up by 4!
Oh right! Buffalo! Yeah you can fight them. But they like ramming and charging.
Thankfully we had the RAMEN OF LIFE!
Offense went up by 1! Defense went up by 1! Guts went up by 1! Maximum HP went up by 2!
Ah there the white dot.
Now back we go!
I love you game.
Offense went up by 1! Speed went up by 2! IQ went up by 1! Luck went up by 1! Maximum HP went up by 1! Maximum PP went up by 3!
Because we're messenger kids.
And that's it. We made a little sesame's day.
I FOUND HELL.
OWWW MY ORGANS!
WOO FREE PIZZA
Hey, what's that cheeping sound?
I HAVE A BIRD IN MY POCKET.
Also ditch this for....
THE BEST THING.
Free phone and sleep!
Sure. I got lots of stuff.
That's all it takes to get gold? What am I supposed to do with all this burglary gear now!?
A tiny hole.
I HAVE A CHICKEN.
I AM CONFUSED.
Speed went up by 1! Guts went up by 1! Vitality went up by 1! IQ went up by 2! Maximum HP went up by 10!
Oh, baby! Offense went up by 6! Defense went up by 2! Speed went up by 1! Guts went up by 2! IQ went up by 1! Luck went up by 1! Maximum HP went up by 2! Maximum PP went up by 5!
NOT REVERSE DEATH
Oh, baby! Offense went up by 4! Speed went up by 1! Oh, baby! Guts went up by 3! Vitality went up by 2! IQ went up by 2! Sweet! Maximum HP went up by 20! That rocks! Maximum PP went up by 10!
Well after wandering I made my way back here.
And this is what you use chickens for.
And back to the other end of the desert.
OH LOOK THE TRAFFIC JAM MAGICALLY DISAPPEARED
The slot machine's spinny bits are broken so these guys are helping.
Sure why not? There are lots of prizes to win. But the 777 jackpot?
WINNER IS ME
This is very pretty.
And so is this.
And on that note, we stop here.
Next time: Exploring Fourside.
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